Things to Do When You Think
You're Going to Fail Anyway:
1. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!"
2. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure that you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.
3. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.
4. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.
5. 15 min. into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every 15 min.
6. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.
7. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.
8. If the exam is math/sciences related, make up the longest proofs you could possible think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.
9. Try to get people in the room to do a wave.
10. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up!
11. In the middle of the test, have a friend rush into the classroom, tag your hand, and resume taking your test for you. When the teacher asks what's going on, calmly explain the rules of Tag Team Testing to him/her.
12. Wear a superman outfit under your normal clothes. 30 minutes into the exam, jump up and answer your phone, shouting "What? I'm on my way!!". rip off your outer clothes and run out of the room. strike a pose first for added effect.
13. Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards at a 90 degree angle.
14. Bring one pencil with a very sharp point. Break the point off your paper. Sharpen the pencil. Repeat this process for one hour.
15. Make strange noises... get people to stare... look at the person next to you as if he/she did it.
16. Use Invisible Ink to answer the whole exam.
17. Bring cheerleaders.
18. Bring a water pistol with you.
19. Come in wearing a full knight's outfit, complete with sword and shield.
